by Dr Rahim Said
Actress Kate Hudson’s recent candid comments about sex in her 40s highlight something larger than just bedroom talk — it’s about the evolving experience of womanhood at midlife.
In an industry that often glorifies youth, her words resonate with many women who find themselves not fading into the background but stepping into a new phase of confidence, self-awareness, and, as Hudson put it, “freedom.”
The 40s can be a paradoxical decade. For many women, it’s a time when societal expectations shift — no longer seen as youthful ingénues nor quite yet wise matriarchs, they exist in a space that can feel both powerful and overlooked.
Their careers may have peaked, their children (if they have them) are growing more independent, and they’ve likely shed many of the insecurities that plagued them in their 20s and 30s.
This “freedom” Hudson speaks of isn’t just about sex — it’s about agency. Women in their 40s often have a stronger sense of what they want, both in and out of the bedroom. They are less inclined to perform for societal approval and more focused on their own fulfilment. This extends beyond intimacy to career moves, friendships, and lifestyle choices.
Yet, while some women in their 40s embrace this empowerment, others still struggle to remain youthful in a culture that values beauty over experience.
The rise of social media has made ageing a hyper-visible process, where women in their 40s are often compared to their younger selves rather than celebrated for their evolution. The expectation to “age gracefully” comes with contradictions—stay relevant but not desperate, be confident but not arrogant, remain attractive but don’t try too hard.
The 45-year-old Hudson’s comments highlight that for women who embrace this phase of life, it can be a golden era where they prioritise pleasure, whether in their relationships, careers, or personal growth.
It’s a refreshing counterpoint to the outdated notion that a woman’s desirability or worth diminishes with age. If anything, the 40s might just be the decade where women truly come into their own.
The real takeaway from Hudson’s remarks isn’t just about sex; it’s about the broader shift in how women see themselves in midlife. It’s about recognising that the best years aren’t behind them but are, perhaps, just beginning.
WE